So last night C posted his personal ad. And I posted one too, though I specified in it that I'm only looking for friends.

[OK, a quick clarification: the reason he's looking for sex and I'm not is because he wants to experience fucking someone without the emotional attachment thing going on. I did that with pretty much every guy I slept with between my ex and C, so I've been there done that.]

I have been reading stuff about open relationship and polyamory recently, but I think we're not going to go there. I don't think I'd like either of us to have a regular "bit on the side", and frankly I'd be really worried that he'd fall in love with someone else (or I would) and we'd split up. So once he's satisfied his curiosity about one-night stands, and if we still want to sleep with other people, we'll probably be doing it together rather than individually.

I've been really surprised at how enthusiatic I am about helping him find someone to screw. I'm hoping that I'm not going to change my mind and start feeling jealous! I don't think I will; I think I'm only worrying about feeling jealous because that's what you'd normally expect someone in a relationship to feel. The fact is, I know what it's like to have that burning curiosity about sleeping with other people - I had it for ages with my ex and it's one of the main reasons I wanted to end it with him - and I'd rather help my hun satisfy that curiosity than have him keep on wondering or do it without my knowledge.

Plus, I'll admit, the idea of him flirting/making out/sleeping with another person, especially a guy, turns me on. But then I'm like that ;-)

I've also suggested that some time we go out on the pull together: go to a club dressed in our finest and see how many snogs we can land (but without taking anyone home, of course). I think that would be fun! I'll admit that I miss those Saturday nights when I was single, and KT & I would go out with the aim of pulling as many guys as possible :-)

In other news, it's the two year anniversary of my tubal tomorrow! Two whole years of non-bitter barren-ness! Woohoo! I'm actually looking forward to it more than I looked forward to my birthday. I'd like to do something to celebrate, but I think it'll only be as much as going out for a drink at our local. Hmm, shouldn't a "proper" 2nd birthday party be jelly and ice-cream and a magician, rather than beer? ;-)

Talking about my infertility this morning with C made us think about him having to be extra careful when he sleeps with a woman. Heh, it must suck to be a guy and to only have such limited contraceptive options. Thank dog I don't have to think about any of that stuff any more! And sperm. OK, so I'm nowhere near as almost-phobic about getting pregnant as I was before I had the snip, but thinking this morning about the fact that C is fertile and I'm not gave me a squick thinking about sperm. Not semen, sperm. Hmm, it's been a long time since I even thought about stuff like that...

I have really bad period pain. Ow. Dammit, I'd rather be at home with daytime TV and a hot water bottle, than here in the office!