Work is nightmareish. So much for enjoying my last few days - instead, I'm buried under a mountain of work. This is because they're not replacing me, and I haven't been told who (if anyone) will be taking over maintenance of my projects after I leave. There's only one person who really could, but he's already snowed under. This company is a joke, and I'm expecting a mass walkout some time in the nearish future.

Not that any of this is my concern after Thursday. I'm trying not to care, but it's not really all that easy.

Blah. I have more important things to think about. Like... my will!

Zoiks!

No, I'm not dying (any more than the rest of us are), but when C and I agreed we'd move in together, one of the things he mentioned was that I get a will. He has to get one too, BTW, this isn't one-sided. I should have got one when I bought my flat, but it somehow got lost in the planning.

So I need to go see someone who understands legalese, and get a will. And while I'm there, I want advice on co-habitation agreements, since C and I are in a slightly unusual situation. I know it's not a likely thing to happen, and I'm not sure if it's legally possible, but my worst nightmare is for me to lose sole rights of ownership on my property, and then for C's XW to be able to make a claim on those rights. Or something. I mean, I want C to feel that my home is his home, but I don't want him trying to make off with it if we fall out, or for his XW to make a claim on it if she & he fall out.

Complicated, much?

Sometimes I wonder if this is actually worth it; but I know it makes financial sense for both of us. I'll be able to live comfortably and still get treats like CDs and maybe a holiday; C will be able to pay off his debts. And I won't have to face trudging to and from his place at horrible hours of the morning or night. And I'll get access to a vacuum cleaner and a washing machine!!

The will is something I should have done a-g-e-s ago. If I were to snuff it now, intestate, my parents would get the lot. And while I love my parents, I would rather other people got my stuff, if only because my parents have no idea about what I'd want doing with it. I suppose the most important person I have to think about is Jerry, but I can't leave my flat to her. She's a cat, for pete's sake. Can I make a will and say that Jerry, and the flat, will be left to "a named caretaker"? I have no idea. Bah, I'll have to ask the solicitor. There must be some way of sorting it out.

Of course, I have to find a solicitor, too. Dammit, I hate having to do grown-up stuff like this. I am starting feel a late-20s sense of responsibility. Urgh.

And there's something else about C and I moving in together: I can't bring myself to tell my parents. I'm too chicken. I'm not ashamed of C or anything stupid like that, it's just that telling them will open the question floodgates. You can't tell my mum anything without facing a barrage of questions, and they're exhausting to deal with. The "Hat?" questions of a few months ago pissed me off tremendously, and I know that any questions relating to us moving in together will have the same effect.

C has told me just to be honest with her: we're doing it for financial reasons, we're not "setting up home" together. This will cause my mum to pull a face and make out I'm a failure at relationships.

Alternatively, my mum will get the wrong end of the stick, become overjoyed, and start arranging the wedding.

Alternatively, my mum will get all up in arms about how he, being a man without a stable job, is "taking advantage" of me. And I'll get an earful. She already quesrions me relentlessly about his employment status, and I can't bring myself to tell her it's none of her f&*@ing business whether or not he's got a job.

I really can't see any way that she'll be OK with it in a way that I'm OK with. If that makes sense.

So, for the moment, I'm not telling them. C really wants me to tell them, but I can't face it. It was hard enough telling them that I had a new boyfriend, that I was changing jobs etc etc. Godammit, why can't I just have parents who I can talk to, and who respect my decisions and accept them as they are?? Or do parents just not do that?

Blargh.

OK, so times like this make me pine for the nice, uncomplicated, single life. But I don't want that really. I think!